Wednesday, August 8, 2012


Courage, what is it, who possesses it, and how do we attain it?
I have heard people say, "that man was born with courage" and have seen things such as a father trying to teach his son to be courageous. So are we born with it, or can it be taught?
Over the past week, fear has somehow crept back into my life; fear of rejection, fear of failure, fear of opening my past back up, and fear of remembering. This past Sunday at church fear engulfed me. It had me playing the "what if" game. All of a sudden I felt exposed, vulnerable, and honestly, scared.
I believed I had walked through the healing process of my past, felt I had dealt with it and accepted it. I was ready to be a voice, to help others out of the horrific shame and torment of sexual abuse. I could hear that old familiar voice filling my head with lies. 
Then on Monday night I was invited over to some very close friends' house for dinner. That night our kids played, we ate, and had a chance to talk. It is amazing what talking out loud can do for one's soul. It exposes the lies instead of keeping them locked up in our heads where soon they will penetrate our hearts if left unresolved. 
So for me, courage is something that is achieved by those who choose to not give up and choose to continue on. Even when fear is screaming to do just the opposite. In every person there is a burden. A burden so strong it pulls at thier soul. For some it is to teach, others to go on mission trips or to be a doctor, etc. For me that burden is to look into the eyes of children that have had their innocence stolen and tell them they are beautiful. That if they feel the world has left and abandoned them to make it known that God has made them for wonderful things and that they have never forgotten.

"Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts" ~ Winston Churchill